Thursday, May 10, 2007

Neurotic Me

Apparently, I've hit an obsessive swing again.

Chief on my list of things that are plaguing my mind are:

a) When I query my Dream Agency, should I send a query to the agency as a whole (they offer that as an option) or to one specific agent? On one hand, if I send it to the agency as a whole, I worry that I will get lost in the masses. On the other hand, if I send it to the one specific agent, I worry that I will miss the opportunity of having another really good agent see/like me.

b) I am desperate to start the upcoming Big Revision. I know where I have weaknesses, I know where my writing is just decidedly second (or third or fourth) rate. However, if I start it now, before the rest of the book is finished, I'll just be going back repeatedly to revise, instead of just once.

c) And, of course, the all oppressive "What if I'm just not GOOD enough?" obsession. Realistically, I know I am a good storyteller. Heck, I've read books and known I could do better. (I've also read books that made me feel like a tiny little slug under a rock) But me knowing I'm a good storyteller doesn't help, if I can't get what's in my head on paper. Can I truly put into words the world and the people that are so rich and full in my mind? Can I make people see what I see?

This obsessive rant brought to you by the strawberry shake and the two cherry pies I had for lunch. Yay sugar high!

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