So there!

Spork to the EYES!

Yes my lovelies, it's that time again. (No, not THAT time. I'm not so hurting for blog chatter that I'll talk about THAT time) It's time for the Quarterly Project From Hell.

I could ramble on and on about the idiocy and redundancy that goes into this monumental effort, but really, it's nothing I haven't complained about before. Suffice it to say that there will be very little writing done this week as I wrestle with this thing.

And the sad thing is, I actually like the Real Job(tm) except for once a quarter, when I punctually threaten to jump out the window and/or spork my eyes out. My bosses are used to it at this point, it doesn't even phase them anymore.

Out of Witty Titles

I'm drained today, as I usually am after I manage a writing marathon. Yes, 1400 words counts as a marathon for me. I finished chapter 11 (finally) and got a full page-and-smidge into chapter 12.

No news on the submission front, and it's rather getting me down. I know that one agent has my material ('cause I e-mailed and asked) but I status checked on the other outstanding partial, and haven't heard back on that one at all. So of course, I fear that the pages AND the status check e-mail were swept into spam filter limbo.

Just what I need, another thing to be paranoid over.

No News is No News

I shamelessly stole this from the Absolute Write boards, but really, what else is there to say?

For some reason, I was absolutely convinced that I would have a rejection from Super Gonzo Dream Agent waiting for me in my mailbox today, but it wasn't there. I did, however, have junk mail, alleviating my worries that the neighbor kids are stealing my mail again. (please, Dream Agent, just e-mail me even if it's bad news. I don't trust the hellions across the street)

I elected to ignore Project 3 today, since it's currently a source of much frustration and angst. I did peruse project 4 again though (what little I have written, and my notes) and you know, it still sounds pretty good. It's more of an urban fantasy-ish thing, and I'm starting to wonder if I'm destined to write urban fantasy exclusively. My fantasy stuff always seems to stall (usually because it's not meeting some vague self-imposed high standards I've set).

Note, when I say "always" I mean really the two things I've seriously attempted (Projects 1 & 3). I'm fairly certain this isn't a large enough sample to accurately see a trend, but hey, why get picky?

Frustration

You ever have that feeling that you're on the verge of something great but it's not...quite....there yet? I feel that way about project 3. The potential is there, if I can just...figure out what it is that I'm missing. I think the plot is good. I think the characters are good. The premise is great. But there's something in the tone I just haven't captured yet.

The closest explanation I can come up with is: I am aiming for a steampunk-ish world. I have the steam, I'm seriously lacking in punk. And I'm not even sure if that's an accurate complaint.

I am seriously considering going back to do a major revise on the first chapters I already have done before I can move on. I swore I wouldn't do it, but it may become necessary.

A River Runs Through It

It being my yard, driveway, basement, and apparently also the neighbor's septic tank and the parking lot of the church behind us. Yes, the water main is still broken, still gushing, though Friday night, some very enterprising young man did spend two hours painting colorful marks on the street and posting little orange flags in my yard. (y'know, the yard that is now technically lakefront property)

And, as part of the neuroses that makes me me, I am of course completely stressed out about a situation I can do nothing about. I am at the mercy of the monopoly that is our water services department.

The downside being that the stress has effectively neutered me (spayed me?) creatively. Project 2 is out to readers, and the query letter is enough to make me commit seppuku. Projects 3 through 5 are at a screeching standstill, and I'm not even sure why. They're just not...alive in my head like I think they ought to be. If this is one of those writerly things I'm supposed to work through, I wish someone would tell me. I even went back last night and re-read most of my work on Project 1 (which is still living on a farm with a nice family that loves it), and just couldn't find that spark to start working again.

I should probably sit down and read something. Reading always seems to kindle something in my creative bone. But even then, I look at the huge stacks of waiting-to-be-read books, and it kind of overwhelms me, so I finally walk away without choosing anything.

Maybe I just need to accept that I'm on a small break, and quit fretting.

Editing Blows

And no, that's not a noun, that's a verb. I am seriously sick to death of editing. I do believe that everything I've done so far is making the book better, but part of me wants to kick my own butt because I didn't think of this stuff the first go round. Mighta saved a lotta people some heartache and tons of lost reading time.

The January 31st deadline looms, and I am confident in saying I will NOT make it. My goal had been to have a submit-able manuscript, as well as a good query letter and synopsis written by then. The manuscript isn't ready yet, the query letter is...pathetic, and I haven't even tried a synopsis yet. (the query letter has made me condense-shy)

Makes me wish I could buy Cliffs Notes for my own book.

Slacking

For some reason, when I hit post on this one, it didn't take. And I'm not sure I feel up to typing it all again.

Suffice it to say, status normal, still in limbo, and I'm working on new stuff too, slowly.

There is more to life than writing

There was no writing done today. Instead, I spent the day dealing with a car that suddenly would not function no matter how I begged, cursed, or beat on it. It's days like this that I sorely miss my father. He was the best mechanic in the entire world.

The good news is that it was only the battery in the car that was borked. The bad news is that it took them over $200 in diagnostics to determine that. Oh well, better safe than sorry, I guess.

Hopefully, tomorrow's writing will be back on schedule.

The voices are talking to me

I admit, I am a slave to my neurosis. (neuroses? I'm too lazy to look up which one is plural, right now)

I think I was happier before I discovered the "word count" tool in Microsoft Word. Curse you, Bill Gates! Even in the midst of my revisions, I am agonizing over every single word. And then I realize that the actual word count differs drastically from the 250-words-per-page method of word counting. I mean...HUGE difference. And then I worry about which one people want to see. (I know the answer to that. It depends on the person)

And I know if I write to word count, I'm only hurting myself. If I write to fill words, I'll end up putting in unnecessary padding. If I write to cut words, I may cut things that I should leave.

Just write the story, stupid! Argh.

On a saner note: I added about 800 words to chapter 2, today.

The Great Writing-less Writing Blog

So, I'm not sure what to blog about, now that I'm taking an officially sanctioned week off from the writing process.

I started the Quarterly Project From Hell at the Real Job (tm) today. I have already reached the point where I can do no more work until other people get back to me. I think that's the part I hate, that I have to depend on the work ethic of others to complete this task. If it were just up to me, I'd bang it out, have it done, and be on my way.

Every day, I have opened up chapter 1, with the intention of simply thinking about it. I already know that the opening paragraph is weak. It always has been, and the tone of it simply doesn't match the tone of the rest of the book (hazard of coming first, before I'd had time to find the right voice). So, I keep pondering that first paragraph, trying to figure out how my main character would introduce himself to the world. He' s a bit of a smart ass, so I'm sure there's going to be something sarcastic in it. I don't feel bad that I haven't figured out how to start it yet. (all these "Great First Lines" threads and contests I keep seeing have me very intimidated. Think anyone would notice if I stole someone else's?) I'll start feeling bad NEXT week, when is when I've said I want to start writing again.

Now, since I have a three-day weekend coming up (yay Columbus Day!) does my next week start on Monday or Tuesday? Hmm...

If Wishes Were Fishes...

...the house would smell like rotting cod.

Sorry, that was my deep thought for the day. It's the most I've accomplished all day.

Work is driving me batty. Friends are driving me batty. People I don't even know are driving me batty.

Needless to say, there is no writing being done.

Molasses in January

Would be faster than I'm writing, right now.

I managed another 600-ish words on chapter 17 today, but it's far from finished. I'm not sure if my creativity is lagging, or my Real Job (tm) is just sucking my will to live. Then, there's the matter of this nasty sinus headache that popped up out of nowhere today. That, I blame on the impending thunderstorms that should be arriving any minute now.

I hate storms, I'm not real fond of my Real Job (tm) right now, and I loathe loathe loathe not writing up to my own speed standards.

Watching Paint Dry

Watching paint dry would be infinitely more amusing than what I've been doing at the Real Job (tm) lately. At least then I would have the hope of getting high on the paint fumes. But no, we are stuck with the most unbelievably mind-numbing, soul-sucking tasks this week.

You would think, being this bored, that it would lend me more time to write, in amongst. You would be wrong. This much boredom isn't good for creativity, and I spent all day painfully grinding out about 600 more words on chapter 16. While they were decent and offered interesting insight into the character...I have the sinking feeling I'll be cutting/severely editing them in later revisions.

Ah well, that's what first drafts are for.

Today's Efforts

I churned out about 700-ish words on chapter 16 today, and then the Real Job (tm) reared its ugly head and that was all she (well, I really) wrote. But it came at a point where I'd written myself into a stuck place, so the timing was good.

And oddly, it isn't a stuck place where I don't know what happens next. This project is fairly well outlined, (one of the reasons it's going so quickly, I think) but occasionally I hit a snag where I simply can't string more than three words together to get from Point A to Point B. This usually occurs when I am transitioning between scenes without a chapter break. There's only so many graceful ways to do it, and sometimes, I flounder.

I trust, however, that when I pull up the document tomorrow morning, the solution will spring right out at me and then I'll feel ridiculous for struggling with it in the first place.

Struggling through Muck

Well, sleep didn't help me resolve my chapter 15 issues. I still don't like what I've done.

I tried editing things, to make it flow better. I tried tying it into a new section at the end of the chapter that would "undo" what I did that I don't like. But when all is said and done, I think I'm going to be deleting a huge chunk of text. Sadly, I'm not sure what I'm going to be replacing it with.

The hazard I'm stumbling into, with chapters 15-18 is that these are the ones I wasn't sure about in the first place. This would be day four in my story's timeline, and it's the day when I'm not sure what happened. Sure, I have things to put in there NOW, but they didn't just spring fully formed into my head like the rest of the tale. And because I struggled with the idea, I wonder if the actual writing of the idea will feel like a struggle too. (or, if because I struggled with the idea, it means its actually a BAD idea)

Deep Thoughts, by...

Well, I'm no Jack Handy. Maybe I'm just having an introspective morning.

I sit here, and I'm tired of being ordinary. I'm tired of "ok, just keep at it, and in the future, all this great stuff MIGHT happen!" I want my great stuff now, dammit!

I'm envious of those I read about on Absolute Write, who now have book releases...or book sales...or new agents...or query rejections. Heck, I'd love to have a query rejection. At least then I'd know I was out there, I was DOING it instead of just talking about it.

I'm no where near that stage yet. Earlier this year, with Project #1, I thought I was close. But realistically, I know now that I wasn't. The rewrite was a good thing, even if it pushed my personal deadline back. Putting out crap is worse than putting out nothing, in my mind.

And now of course, I have project #2 which is flying by quite nicely. First draft of that might be done by Christmas, if I don't hit a snag. Maybe have revisions done by March? Start sending out queries? Either way, it's not NOW. I want something wonderful to happen NOW.

Have I mentioned that patience is not my strong suit?

A blow to freedom

Or something like that.

They've finally done it. They've blocked my blog access at work. What in the world am I going to do now?? Even more importantly, are they also going to block the forums I visit frequently. Honestly, if I can't multitask while I work, I'll go stark raving mad.

This might actually be the thing that makes me look for a new Real Job(tm).

On an up note, I wrote a minimal amount towards chapter 9 today. The work is still untitled, and it's starting to bug me. How can I have all these great novel-length creative urges, and yet something as tiny as a title stumps me. Where's the justice, I ask you?

Titles

I am lousy with titles. I don't know if you've noticed, but titling my blog posts is even taxing the limits of my creativity.

My first work-in-progress (stall-in-progress?) has a "working" title, because I had to call it SOMEthing. Especially after I started the second one, when saying "my book" would no longer suffice.

It's the second one that's picking at my brain today. Not only do I want to come up with a title, but I would also like to come up with a vague series title as well. (y'know, for when the unbelievable happens and folks want to read MORE) I'm looking for something vaguely Japanese sounding. Something with a samurai flavor, but not...too. I have no idea if that made sense.

Granted, I know that if/when anything of mine gets published, the publisher is just as likely to throw my title out the window and come up with one of their own. (this is why Jim Butcher gave us Death Masks instead of Holy Sheet.) But still, the first title you present to an agent/publisher should say something about the work and give them an idea of what to expect.

Apparently, they can expect a great deal of nothing from me.

Slowly but Surely

Ok, while I still seem to have hit an insurmountable block regarding my novels (both of them, oi), I am intending today to sit down and write a short piece on some roleplaying stuff for a friend. Sure, it's not gonna get me the big bucks, but it should be fun and I'm always happiest when I'm writing no matter what it is.

Does it count as writer's block if you're only blocked on certain works?